Oomphwork is for you if...
You know – it's that general sense that it's all just too much, but you still carry on - often because other people depend on you. You're organised and get things done, but perhaps you get up in the morning and secretly wish you could climb straight back into bed. Sometimes life's a blur – and you're right in the middle of it, yet you might feel like you're wading through treacle too. And so often, other people's negative 'stuff' gets to you – and whilst you do your best for them, you sometimes feel hurt or disappointed by their remarks or behaviour. Sometimes you wonder where all the fun and joy in your life has gone.
So many of us go through months (and often years) of our life in an emotional whiplash phase. We juggle the demands of work, family, relationships – keeping everything together but putting our own needs last. Sometimes our loved one's mental health is an issue too – and that can really take its toll. Sometimes (without meaning to) we enable negative situations to continue by being too caring and kind, and we make decisions based on the needs and wishes of others, whilst ignoring the voice inside of us that is crying out to be heard. So many of us just keep on struggling, making do, and doing our best for everyone except ourselves.
But some of us have other ideas. We've had enough, and we're ready. We're ready to take a stand and look after our own needs and wellbeing too. We're ready to heal the impact of the whiplash, and ready to give ourselves some time and space. And we want to find some new ways to deal with everything. We may not be able to change our circumstances, but we're ready to choose how much they impact on us!
I had a client who went to a yoga class once and decided it wasn't for her because she couldn't stop thinking about everything else she felt she 'should' be doing instead. So she went home, had a few glasses of wine and flopped into bed – as she did most evenings.
She lived in a mental whirlwind. She worked extremely hard, was ambitious and driven, and she was super-stressed. Yet whenever anyone asked how she was she'd say "I'm fine!" But she really wasn't. One day she went to the doctor's for a routine check up and burst into tears. And then it all came out – she was finding it hard to focus, was forgetting things and regularly woke up worrying about work issues after a fitful night's sleep. Soon she was signed off work with stress, and initially she hated that because it meant having several weeks with 'nothing' to do.
As the weeks went by, she discovered that she actually quite liked having the time off. Circumstances had forced her to slow right down, and she began to re-evaluate her life. As we worked together, she began to connect with her true self again – and rediscovered things that had brought her fun and joy before she became shackled by her own self-imposed, limiting beliefs regarding her career.
When she eventually returned to work, she told me she felt like a new woman. She'd lightened up considerably, and felt refreshed and enthusiastic. She said: "I think if I'd changed some things earlier on, this wouldn't have happened. I thought I was a strong person, but I collapsed. I feel stronger inside now - that's the difference. And happier!" And with that we both burst out laughing together – a beautiful, spontaneous moment of shared joy.
Are you ready to reconnect with your true self, the real you - the one who feels free to be joyful, laugh and play and have fun?
Are you willing to let go of the beliefs and behaviours that are holding you back? Are you ready to bring more flow and ease into your life and enjoy better health, whilst getting the results you really want in your work?
My friend Sid was a Social Worker for twenty years. He'd started his career with energy and enthusiasm, and had great commitment and skill. But one day he said to me: "I'm leaving in the new year. I've had enough." Two years later he was still there. When I asked him about this he said: "Yeah well... I've got financial commitments you know. And it's not too bad. Don't know what else I'd do really..." But I could tell he wasn't happy.
A year later, he announced that he was upping sticks and moving to France. He'd bought an olive farm! He was so excited and enthusiastic – this was the Sid I'd known years ago, full of life and fun and seeing the potential and possibilities in every challenge.
I asked him - why now, what had made the difference? He said quite simply that he was ready. He'd hankered to start afresh earlier, but the pull of the familiar was too strong, so though he'd felt stuck, he'd chosen to stay put.
Like still water in a lake, Sid could have stayed put for years, and his life would probably have been all right. But he knew he wasn't happy and he wanted something more. There was something bubbling under the surface though, and when he was ready, he made the changes he needed to make, and the water started to surge and sparkle afresh.